a shadowy quiet

January is a very still, quiet month. Not much happens and not much changes.

I have been quiet too, especially on here. There's not much light for photographs and not many words in any case. I am not at all unhappy, and family life is full and busy. There just isn't much to report. I'm not feeling especially witty, I haven't been creating every day, there is nothing particular to share. I'm slightly disappointed that this is all I can say about my January, but so it is.

What there has been is the rhythm of daily life, recovery from illness, slow growth, a huge winter turn-out, log fires, some crochet and some reading, enjoying the lengthening days, little green shoots, the sound of birdsong again. I have been really enjoying this and I loved this, and this is interesting too.

a little light in the darkness

I am finding that I need to hold on really tightly at the moment to my words and wishes... so many things threaten to chase them away... tiredness, dark nights, heaviness, work.

I am someone who generally likes to operate on a spontaneous basis from within a framework of stability. When instability makes spontaneity impossible or too difficult, it can feel like a sort of entrapment, and the only things I end up doing are the things I don't want to do. So I have been challenged to approach things differently... normally I like to book holidays when I feel like taking them... this year I have decided to book them in now so that they are there, ready to pop up when I need them (and I do, already). So, this weekend we are going away for one night to a lovely boutique hotel in one of my favourite ever places, and next month we are cashing in half our Airmiles for a few days of sun. In the summer I have a tiny little cottage lined up. In the autumn I think we might go and see Paris again.

Normally this sort of forward planning scares me, but one of the things that's given me confidence is having completed a whole year of lists. A year ago, I decided to list five things every day that made me happy... reading back over the year is a wonderful aide memoire of all the things we did and the places we went and when we went... meaning that this year, I can predict for myself when something new might be just the thing. It's also a lovely record of the changes of seasons, moods, little people, the garden, the birds, everything that's meaningful. If you haven't discovered Listography yet, I passionately recommend it! You can search your lists, I love doing that.

...newness of life

Thank you so much for your good wishes for 2011. Along with others that I have received this year in cards and letters, I have created a mobile to remind myself of all the words that others have wished, prayed and hoped for me this new year. I have attached it to my lampshade where it is twirling gently in the warm air, releasing all these good things into my life...

I would like to wish all these same things for you, my friends, and so here they are... catch them and sew them up into your own lives too...

...light...spirit...wonderful...peace...expression...happiness...
fulfilment...God...amazing...space...resilience...joy...time...love...
...laughter...health...reflection...growth...inspiration...fun...
...creativity...