tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-79731888898483585882024-03-05T08:44:01.862+00:00mouse notebookmouse notebook is my place to explore ideas and inspirations, craft, art, making things, garden, writing, nature, life, thread, cloth, yarn, wool, drawing, painting.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.comBlogger272125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-66302708331027235202020-01-29T15:05:00.003+00:002020-01-29T15:54:15.557+00:00about this blog<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I started this blog in 2008 as a space to reflect on my creative journey at that time, and to sell the things I made and stitched. Over the next eight years or so I painted, stitched, crocheted, gardened, photographed, read, cooked, nurtured my family, and wrote about it on these pages. It is a little snapshot of my life during those years, and the many lovely comments bear witness to the beautiful online community of bloggers and artists who supported each others work during that time. I am no longer updating this blog and am now focusing on my art practice of drawing, painting and printmaking. You can find me on Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/sue_mcloughlin/">@suemcloughlin</a>Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-71627623489743747142016-09-16T15:24:00.002+01:002016-09-16T15:24:31.510+01:00guest room<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I recently spent a lovely few days in Denmark with a good friend. Today she is stopping over at my house overnight, and I enjoyed making the spare room pretty, with the help of a few flowers from the late-summer garden. </div>
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Soon I will post some photos of beautiful Denmark - such a light and airy country with an exquisite aesthetic.</div>
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<br />Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-2813305451113409252016-08-01T20:11:00.001+01:002016-08-01T20:11:16.224+01:00happy nasturtiums<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm having a go at blogging from my phone. Uploading the photos seems way more complicated than it should be, but hopefully this will work. Lovely bright orange nasturtiums from the garden.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-46386200084936183982016-04-18T14:12:00.002+01:002016-04-18T14:12:22.054+01:00chitting<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Spring is springing and the blackbirds are singing late into the
increasingly light evenings. My thoughts are turning to the veg patch,
where the rhubarb I planted last year is tantalisingly pink and lush,
but out of bounds until next year to let it get settled in. These
wrinkly little chaps are soaking up all the light they can get and
sending their little greeny pink shoots outwards and upwards, ready to
turn into delicious new potatoes for supper. Fragrant narcissi are
illuminating the garden. The Sarah Raven catalogue is the reading of
choice. I love spring.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-49603886241253607542016-01-16T21:37:00.003+00:002016-01-16T21:37:51.072+00:00blocking<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Over the last week or so, the starfish flowers have been worked up in a loooonnnnngggg string of teal Baby Cashmerino and are being blocked ready to turn into an infinity-scarf-necklace-thingy...Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-39633318186102332652016-01-03T13:21:00.001+00:002016-01-03T13:21:17.578+00:00starfish flowers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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What is a rainy Sunday for, really, other than to teach yourself how to crochet starfish-flowers and join them together?<br />
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I used <a href="http://atty-s.blogspot.nl/2014/08/joined-flowers-tutorial.html?m=1">this</a> pattern. I am wondering about a starfish-flower-scarf-necklace now...Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-73731686391897882802016-01-02T16:27:00.002+00:002016-01-02T16:27:38.776+00:00the way to amaryllis...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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...four days of loveliness...Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-49778511561398939762015-12-29T17:13:00.002+00:002015-12-29T17:13:22.536+00:00swedish christmas embroidery<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Look at this absolutely beautiful vintage Swedish Christmas embroidery I saw at the home of a friend today. It was her mother's and is very old. I loved the colours and the simple stitching. God Jul!Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-68587162226916625952015-12-20T17:25:00.001+00:002015-12-20T17:27:43.062+00:00the hopefulness of mistletoe <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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One of my favourite books to read at this time of year is <i>What to Look for in Winter</i> written by the poetic and mysterious E.L. Grant Watson. I love this series of Ladybird books and for me each change of season is marked by their beautiful words and C. F. Tunnicliffe's evocative illustrations.<br />
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Last weekend I spent a few days with friends in the thin winter light and quiet landscape of North Somerset. Everywhere you looked, the tall skeletal trees were laden with bright green orbs of mistletoe, hanging in the damp still air. Apparently it is a very good year for mistletoe, although I am not sure why. I don't know if anyone has identified exactly how it appears, but in 1959 E.L. Grant Watson wrote "How mistletoe grows on trees nobody knows for sure. Poplars and apple trees are the most likely hosts for this half-parasitic plant. If you can find out how mistletoe germinates, you will be a discoverer of one of Nature's secrets". <br />
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Like Grant Watson himself, a beautiful mystery. If anyone knows anything about him other than the thin sprinkling of information on the web I would love to know. But if you know how mistletoe germinates, don't tell me. I like living with the enigma, and think of Rainer Maria Rilke, who wrote "Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves". This is a thought I carry with me daily. There are many unanswered questions in life these days. But it is still beautiful.<br />
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<br />Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-47225203108437276922015-09-13T19:23:00.001+01:002015-09-13T19:26:11.758+01:00beauty<br /><br /><center><a href='http://photo.blogpressapp.com/show_photo.php?p=15/09/13/190.jpg'><img src='http://photo.blogpressapp.com/photos/15/09/13/s_190.jpg' border='0' width='280' height='254' style='margin:5px'></a></center><br /><br />This little posy of late summer flowers from the garden is doing my heart good. That I have a garden at all, with flowers in, is enough for today. <br /><br />Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-8998797214545308442015-08-25T22:08:00.000+01:002015-08-25T22:17:44.081+01:00summer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This summer has been about lettuce...<br />
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...and days out to lovely places with beautiful things to see...<br />
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...travelling to see friends in different cities...<br />
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...abundance, fruitfulness, and jam... <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEho4BHbQQkPYRZSmD5wPJUsoypL3xU_ZrNhjRScKfKhfRKu0P9EP0brqhdTviJC_TburhobrN0Pm4IzARAjjvXchOD-FEq2HypHWe1TlPe1B-AMlFdSw-sWDEtioVek3A68qTWvUd1fUEk/s1600/IMG_5557.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEho4BHbQQkPYRZSmD5wPJUsoypL3xU_ZrNhjRScKfKhfRKu0P9EP0brqhdTviJC_TburhobrN0Pm4IzARAjjvXchOD-FEq2HypHWe1TlPe1B-AMlFdSw-sWDEtioVek3A68qTWvUd1fUEk/s400/IMG_5557.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
<br />
...unexpected creativity in surprising moments... <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghJ-rMMgRsQd06oG0d9RwoMEKbmMdR5NJ48QuygNbI1hfvQzaCkkx9w86NAOY2PNUmL3PyoeZ__qvB4eI1xKRoUYwhYYiz1tp-HMKiSbonv5AyYEJh9k_UVBPanZQvequ91l3l6fUmu_s/s1600/IMG_5609.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghJ-rMMgRsQd06oG0d9RwoMEKbmMdR5NJ48QuygNbI1hfvQzaCkkx9w86NAOY2PNUmL3PyoeZ__qvB4eI1xKRoUYwhYYiz1tp-HMKiSbonv5AyYEJh9k_UVBPanZQvequ91l3l6fUmu_s/s400/IMG_5609.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
...crochet in the sunshine...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia1m-jnHbjY2NXjnNA21fQ0EAZcw1W2KB0mFCotsNe-csTbultzG9ZbfVwSEsO9_hmOkJ4ChgcqJkJiaL5CxsTb_n3EOQFLFRI9G7YSpeA50AuR2V_yLMSceNkPTj8zM01g5jAmZBwnmY/s1600/IMG_5563.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia1m-jnHbjY2NXjnNA21fQ0EAZcw1W2KB0mFCotsNe-csTbultzG9ZbfVwSEsO9_hmOkJ4ChgcqJkJiaL5CxsTb_n3EOQFLFRI9G7YSpeA50AuR2V_yLMSceNkPTj8zM01g5jAmZBwnmY/s400/IMG_5563.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
<br />
...food outdoors.<br />
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And many other things, beautiful and ugly, peaceful and anxious, familiar and new, safe and scary. Life goes on, all summer long.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-12136938319009152172015-05-26T11:06:00.001+01:002015-05-26T11:06:39.884+01:00slow and steady <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHXKYzMmMpSzLRKK-BnWvJMBAWvS32LJ5IjZaA9APfWSURosKvBhT9tc_vFdCUb8RLx1JHCCVah8uzaW5TQL7D0PvHDtfVIl2qq6baM5zgG714qYMfLYPgxAn2xXlCG_kNnBCcCFYCgE0/s1600/photo+11.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHXKYzMmMpSzLRKK-BnWvJMBAWvS32LJ5IjZaA9APfWSURosKvBhT9tc_vFdCUb8RLx1JHCCVah8uzaW5TQL7D0PvHDtfVIl2qq6baM5zgG714qYMfLYPgxAn2xXlCG_kNnBCcCFYCgE0/s400/photo+11.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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Since I last wrote, I have been making paths and planting things...<br />
<br />
...making lots and lots of these in different colours<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGtoCZFjKq7XNTOLKcBGFVnTm0VCUS2f0QtWb0FlpkXM2XQMy0KvN6kJEmqo1UBNDXzW_0b41dwnZc_k6giK172iUyqQgccZoZyPV4nD8ainRGwS4P9w_5y5NeVcMGdUCUYkqMPEaFfq0/s1600/photo+2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGtoCZFjKq7XNTOLKcBGFVnTm0VCUS2f0QtWb0FlpkXM2XQMy0KvN6kJEmqo1UBNDXzW_0b41dwnZc_k6giK172iUyqQgccZoZyPV4nD8ainRGwS4P9w_5y5NeVcMGdUCUYkqMPEaFfq0/s400/photo+2.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
<br />
...to see if I can finish this<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbHugYbZumNOVDrE1ofoJkw9CyDRrhAxNnnsrBF57jynS8O5E3VV6z5e_BXWMOj5Sxsy2zH_ogrQIUcsDObkK7g-aihTUvL3R_3hfgX_olZm3hObD4JZu5F___FXE9uBF5IqK4ywZMU9A/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbHugYbZumNOVDrE1ofoJkw9CyDRrhAxNnnsrBF57jynS8O5E3VV6z5e_BXWMOj5Sxsy2zH_ogrQIUcsDObkK7g-aihTUvL3R_3hfgX_olZm3hObD4JZu5F___FXE9uBF5IqK4ywZMU9A/s400/photo+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
...walking five minutes from my house to the meadow and the bluebells<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9mo0m2e4bHrUtroQnnrnNSC42RcmgEm4_V3Qsrm7RuHgiT_7pGCcVEvmHHP9fI9bb-Fh-syz8a9jmHLczW2a-J_YiBCEI7BmIYCGGyOfYtSKhYRafsvRmSD3gc_NVV28usJSz3lxT5rY/s1600/photo+22.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9mo0m2e4bHrUtroQnnrnNSC42RcmgEm4_V3Qsrm7RuHgiT_7pGCcVEvmHHP9fI9bb-Fh-syz8a9jmHLczW2a-J_YiBCEI7BmIYCGGyOfYtSKhYRafsvRmSD3gc_NVV28usJSz3lxT5rY/s400/photo+22.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirw1LEHCa8R2PRfwR6HnLeC-c33Z5kYI7OtJpMhg0gH8rSLaexShzfaZ-_2eWqXhYDS1n27GXv3IYm9h8MfgyPcoIwV7E9xJTxJMAIurpY_As98vsW6qptQk6bKFNeYvjDQRHb759t0ZM/s1600/photo+33.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="316" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirw1LEHCa8R2PRfwR6HnLeC-c33Z5kYI7OtJpMhg0gH8rSLaexShzfaZ-_2eWqXhYDS1n27GXv3IYm9h8MfgyPcoIwV7E9xJTxJMAIurpY_As98vsW6qptQk6bKFNeYvjDQRHb759t0ZM/s400/photo+33.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
...listening to lots of music, going to see bands, having a lovely time <a href="http://www.soundsfromtheothercity.com/">here</a> and <a href="http://www.creativetourist.com/articles/festivals-and-events/manchester/hey-manchester-secret-tours-at-chethams-manchester-after-hours-unplugged/">here</a><br />
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...breathing in and out, enlarging the place of my tent and dwelling in green places...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8rjlO5iCgFE70jqluInSHPgIcntmScdan3J09D1o1jinfX3MHeXM4mXa_-gd3QexZgTJf6o0brEhMDgFCFvGtnopAHNcUW80U_XLECt9WrXrzQuR7KVj2aotvS21mCXwxkBCiCEGeoPw/s1600/photo%25284%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="392" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8rjlO5iCgFE70jqluInSHPgIcntmScdan3J09D1o1jinfX3MHeXM4mXa_-gd3QexZgTJf6o0brEhMDgFCFvGtnopAHNcUW80U_XLECt9WrXrzQuR7KVj2aotvS21mCXwxkBCiCEGeoPw/s400/photo%25284%2529.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<br />Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-85053138802931593432015-01-13T11:31:00.001+00:002015-01-13T11:31:55.890+00:00whatsoever things are lovely... think on these things<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicUg2_9bELiaKrIUN_wEM_u_BhnWFlMjjky5_aCOfUHre19BoULpm91rqgOSaBjOL6n7SboMun9Z8zBVWhDOpIO09m9R3Yk56xq0_YDMcBqdcGwRNvV0noOyToMveHbsld4PGFKYdmbU0/s1600/p1090500+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicUg2_9bELiaKrIUN_wEM_u_BhnWFlMjjky5_aCOfUHre19BoULpm91rqgOSaBjOL6n7SboMun9Z8zBVWhDOpIO09m9R3Yk56xq0_YDMcBqdcGwRNvV0noOyToMveHbsld4PGFKYdmbU0/s1600/p1090500+(2).jpg" height="400" width="347" /></a></div>
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Exactly five years ago I began the practice, at bedtime, of writing a list of five things that have made me happy that day. It has been so good for me to do this, to look for the small beauties of life as well as remember the big, wonderful things. I now have over 1700 <a href="http://www.listography.com/mouselist">searchable entries</a> recording snippets from my life over the last five years, which feels like a priceless asset.</div>
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Here are my top twenty nouns, verbs and adjectives. Naturally, tea is right up there. Chicken was a surprise. </div>
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Imogen [my grandaughter], tea, bed, garden, sunshine, lunch, sleep, fire, bath, home, Toby, Isaac [my sons], walk, chocolate, friends, chicken, coffee, breakfast, cake, wine.</div>
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Watching, reading, eating, making, playing, feeling, sitting, thinking, looking, laughing, listening, talking, painting, walking, singing, writing, enjoying, working, finishing, finding. </div>
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Lovely, new, little, beautiful, nice, warm, good, hot, happy, early, quiet, sunny, still, bright, kind, busy, soft, late, fresh, positive. </div>
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Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-22230661637973551752014-12-29T17:06:00.003+00:002014-12-29T17:06:55.214+00:00out with the old<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-SkojeATANlIvT2mKkJUH_I72DyWfdxwUfD1jZdIjmAseBI_WN7FUjKYBkXvrcllpJuPv2ogboVAaxERXmHr4_QLAeXrPk5OpFnWXId0AEVCPjZXg0hzw4Mlm0UZspNjz2g5X0LdWo2c/s1600/photo(3).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-SkojeATANlIvT2mKkJUH_I72DyWfdxwUfD1jZdIjmAseBI_WN7FUjKYBkXvrcllpJuPv2ogboVAaxERXmHr4_QLAeXrPk5OpFnWXId0AEVCPjZXg0hzw4Mlm0UZspNjz2g5X0LdWo2c/s1600/photo(3).JPG" height="366" width="400" /></a></div>
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Over the next few days I shall be 'completing' 2014 with the help of<a href="http://www.superherolife.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/complete-your-year1.pdf"> these insightful questions</a> which I originally found three years ago via
<a href="http://thescentofwater.typepad.com/archive/2011/12/christmas.html">Megan</a>. I have done them every year since then and have found them
incredibly useful in processing what has passed, and as a springboard
into the new year. For me it's a much more meaningful exercise than
party-poppers and fireworks and all the false midnight jollity. This
year there is much to be thankful for and much to look forward to, but
there has also been gut-wrenching disappointment and sadness, and the
possibilities of the new year seem much thinner and more well-concealed
than in past times. </div>
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<br /><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim8bQvDTcf_wXAk_tjEwAT6QBpqYvcgMvllhMUggSEYYDMYQVy98NJZcSsCeS-mpQ6_YcAGGU09FOk6YlqbbNz48zx8pVzCi1sBY9U-y4BGrhZde8ZRAGZ3zt3cClsFlk-MFVzutC8byg/s1600/lymepark.jpg" height="300" width="400" /></div>
<br />One of my primary goals is to make more art,
and try to work through whatever it is that has so far prevented me
from full creative expression. I am both excited and fearful about this.<br /><br />See you next year!Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-2723172278441463922014-11-03T16:29:00.000+00:002014-11-03T16:29:16.992+00:00half-yearly report<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBF5mHNqz0DKCl4rdN_c11nKujIaUSMfPeN_U7eCbiltt2s04xmGEjVBu2QeYZAOQBstVN3BosTcT62qcK9GFEiZra-5mrLqCmN5zOJpnuQDQQZpqfrVDFFzMDF9_9P-b2rt0hFsjYUYw/s1600/photo(2).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBF5mHNqz0DKCl4rdN_c11nKujIaUSMfPeN_U7eCbiltt2s04xmGEjVBu2QeYZAOQBstVN3BosTcT62qcK9GFEiZra-5mrLqCmN5zOJpnuQDQQZpqfrVDFFzMDF9_9P-b2rt0hFsjYUYw/s1600/photo(2).JPG" height="400" width="327" /> </a></div>
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Exactly six months since I last wrote, and a lot has passed. A lot of
hard slog, a lot of lessons learned, both practical and emotional. Most
of the work I have been doing has been with drills and hammers and bags
of rubble, as I press on with making a home and garden from the bare
plastered walls and rectangle of brown earth I moved into at the
beginning of the year. And there has been much progress, and many tears,
and laughing and happiness too. So, most of my 'creative' work has
looked like this...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf8YbimwS4CyIGuAU3JuhyphenhyphenpK4BEp-7SpCNo-tMVOI4HBKzvdl_cO4nF_r5eIMTqoHGijhbIsKc65EAqnMNG9QCl23YBrR9KgysCxTQrYOYt2fR-k0NelAbM72df7xYaFDZxd-bedjGzHA/s1600/photo(1).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf8YbimwS4CyIGuAU3JuhyphenhyphenpK4BEp-7SpCNo-tMVOI4HBKzvdl_cO4nF_r5eIMTqoHGijhbIsKc65EAqnMNG9QCl23YBrR9KgysCxTQrYOYt2fR-k0NelAbM72df7xYaFDZxd-bedjGzHA/s1600/photo(1).JPG" height="400" width="361" /></a></div>
<br />
...but some of it has been more like the picture at the top, as I gradually find time and energy to dig out paintbrushes and concentrate for a few minutes on less practical expressions of creativity. Although most of my artwork is still getting done at the kitchen table with a five-year-old...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDYdRGgS7BAY6EU0F8J45slo7lZqvVmLPindNlWjfhsGdNwRcfcL3NipU0n0QgtmcyuqmuPO-Q_OppYgc8pWVoVBUFnZkCrbqVzgNnAB8ITNzK2LexzZ620IxACPNSUMqVMGF-OkxEbgw/s1600/teapot_art.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDYdRGgS7BAY6EU0F8J45slo7lZqvVmLPindNlWjfhsGdNwRcfcL3NipU0n0QgtmcyuqmuPO-Q_OppYgc8pWVoVBUFnZkCrbqVzgNnAB8ITNzK2LexzZ620IxACPNSUMqVMGF-OkxEbgw/s1600/teapot_art.jpg" height="315" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
...or should I say a five-and-a-half-year-old. Because that's how I know it's exactly six months since I last wrote anything...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSAHfFYcjcP3iUReRMnbX4nrn2n9iJddaxxwo4A5NugkgTbnol6eVvR_VVJd0owChYu27T_QLpJhKPah6i7t_kkmt2qOI2vzLw7odcnFS2guD7PKNO_P9UcCOy9X4Gqx0AYkO5PjjpL2U/s1600/half.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSAHfFYcjcP3iUReRMnbX4nrn2n9iJddaxxwo4A5NugkgTbnol6eVvR_VVJd0owChYu27T_QLpJhKPah6i7t_kkmt2qOI2vzLw7odcnFS2guD7PKNO_P9UcCOy9X4Gqx0AYkO5PjjpL2U/s1600/half.jpg" height="400" width="367" /></a></div>
Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-49509214128515731512014-05-04T18:21:00.001+01:002014-05-04T18:21:44.125+01:00five<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtJz0H_FPSiEXasN3R74qcfwfhZf6RghbyWDc85GcaR5C5bkudJRLGmOty7gi66MRx-mEJPPCzIO8qc5-_bPcSvEisTM47ssRs_RG-kj2__6it9zaf2yGDnOV2Wk8zb-i9krUQDuL9MP4/s1600/baby_hand.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtJz0H_FPSiEXasN3R74qcfwfhZf6RghbyWDc85GcaR5C5bkudJRLGmOty7gi66MRx-mEJPPCzIO8qc5-_bPcSvEisTM47ssRs_RG-kj2__6it9zaf2yGDnOV2Wk8zb-i9krUQDuL9MP4/s1600/baby_hand.jpg" height="297" width="400" /></a></div>
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<br />
Today my funny, clever, loving and beautiful granddaughter
is five. If I'm honest, this is really what I've been doing all this
time. This is what's been absorbing me, keeping me awake at night,
frightening me, limiting me, making me laugh, making me cry. <br /><br />My
son and his then-girlfriend were very young when she was born. Her
mother had very little support from her family and so we had to rally.
Suddenly a little person drove the pace. I say 'we', but it was mostly
me, driven by love and compassion. My son has grown and blossomed into a
strong and loving father and I am intensely proud of him and his
brother, a devoted uncle. There have been many difficult times. My son
now cares for my granddaughter full time and she is happy and thriving.
That is the main thing. Along the way I lost a husband and a home and
any energy for anything but survival. I am not being melodramatic or
asking for pity, in fact I am choosing to hold things back rather than
reveal too much. But she is five. Five! We have come so far. And we have
survived.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-16522986906463909012014-04-17T19:38:00.000+01:002014-04-17T19:38:08.438+01:00nothing to show I don't think I have ever started a post without a photo before, but I honestly have nothing to show and no nice pictures on my phone, so if I am to start any kind of a post at all in 2014, it's going to have to be words-only.<br />
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This year is not panning out like I hoped - at least not yet anyway. I have moved into my house but am nowhere near settled. The builders turned out to be awful in every way and left me with thousands of pounds worth of work that needed finishing, replacing or repairing. I am currently dealing with a collapsed and broken drain under the brand new concrete floor. The central heating is so badly fitted that the noise it makes is almost unbearable. The roof blew off in the storms. Nothing seems to work properly. There are a myriad unpleasant smells. I have acres and acres of painting to do before I can put up pictures or curtains, and the 'garden' is a joke.<br />
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All this has been so overwhelming and demoralising and unsettling and lonely and difficult. Those of you who know me well know that it has almost broken me, but, look! I'm still here. I haven't lifted a crochet hook or dug any soil or opened a book other than to look at pictures or cooked a half-decent meal and I certainly haven't looked at my paints or unpacked my sketchbooks or made anything other than a mess. But, maybe I will one day. And then I'll have something to show.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-72596063636205602032013-12-29T21:34:00.000+00:002013-12-29T21:34:21.995+00:00stuck<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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At midnight on 31st December last year, I lit a sky candle and sent it up into the darkness, full of symbolism and hope for the future. 2012 had been a terrible year for me and I wanted to say goodbye to all the sadness and illness and tears and regret. I felt optimistic and ready for change, ready to embrace new things and new challenges. I loved seeing that sky candle filling with light and heat and pulling away from me into the night sky. I watched it rise up with a happy cheer, a silent wish and a secret prayer.<br />
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The sky candle immediately got stuck in the branches of a tree, and stayed up there for weeks, tattered and forlorn. I saw it every morning from my kitchen window, and felt haunted by its failure to fly and what this might symbolise for my year ahead. Everybody laughed and told me not to be silly and everything would be fine and it was just a sky candle stuck in a tree, nothing more. Finally the rain and wind loosened it and one morning it was gone, so I forgot about it.<br />
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And then a few days ago, I remembered it. And I saw that actually it had spoken the truth, for I have been stuck in one way or another for the whole year, and indeed still am. Our house took forever to sell: months and months of fruitless cleaning and tidying and showing people round, never feeling able to spread out or make a mess for fear of the next viewing, my life on hold. Then eventually in September moving out and putting all my things into storage and taking a few essentials and, aged nearly fifty, with a little granddaughter, becoming a lodger. I expected to rent a room for a few weeks while my house was extended and refurbished... but I'm still here. The builders have taken forever and driven me nearly crazy in the process, and a catalogue of expensive disasters has unfolded. The end is not in sight. I am still living out of a suitcase and surviving on ready meals.<br />
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But yet, I am hopeful... at least a little bit. I know that one day soon I will be able to move in, and a new chapter of my life will begin... a lot later than I expected, and it does feel like I have wasted a whole year waiting for it. But I am painting my shelves so that I can unpack my books, and that feels good.<br />
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I'm not lighting any sky candles this New Year's Eve. I'll be babysitting for my granddaughter, and I'll probably go to bed well before midnight. I don't want to look into the future or even hope or dream. I'll wake up the next morning and it will all unfold just as it would have done anyway.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-61223122032538507292013-12-01T19:23:00.000+00:002013-12-01T19:23:52.050+00:00new beginnings<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This has been the scene at my new house for the past three months. A tiny, unloved, worn, tatty and unremarkable house with an overgrown, tatty garden has been knocked about, stripped bare and ripped apart. Slowly slowly the house has been put back together, added to and improved, and is nearly ready for me to move into, a brand new clean slate for me in so many ways. Tomorrow my furniture and belongings move out of storage and into their new home, and at the weekend I will follow. There is a lot to do but it will be mine to do with as I wish, a gift. It will be exactly one year since my old home went on the market and life changed shape. A very long year, a very hard year, but a neat representation of the circle of life. I hope to be creative there.<br />
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I will be making a Flickr set about the house and the changes that take place there, should you wish to have a look. It's not up yet but will be soon.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-22093881770572599362013-09-22T19:44:00.002+01:002013-09-22T19:45:01.153+01:00home, where my thoughts escaping<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I am popping in to say hello, having spread out my red spotted handkerchief at my temporary lodgings (the photo above is not, of course, my temporary lodgings, but the very lovely <a href="http://www.crosthwaitehouse.co.uk/">Crosthwaite House</a> in Cumbria, which I can heartily recommend).<br />
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I have only intermittent wifi here so internet activity is sporadic. It's a strange and unsettling time getting used to being a lodger for a while, trying to sort out my new house and garden under pressure of time, and of course life doesn't pause itself when times like this happen, either.<br />
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Suffice to say I am rather stressed. I am taking refuge in Pinterest and crochet and toast. I have my art materials here too but they remain untouched for now. A full night's sleep is enough of a challenge for me at the moment.<br />
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Don't go away.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-91814888011900876282013-09-03T20:28:00.002+01:002013-09-03T20:28:31.178+01:00in memory of sally smith<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
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In two weeks I will be leaving this beautiful, rambling old house and putting all my things in storage, and the builders will move into a tiny dull house not too far from here and make it bigger, make it lovelier, make it mine. I will rent a room until it is ready and then I will start a new life there.</div>
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While I was sorting things out in readiness for this new chapter, I found these embroideries from 1989 which I did for an exhibition (where? I can't remember anymore), shortly after I left college. They are called 'In Memory of Sally Smith Part I and Part II' and were inspired by the gravestone of a young woman I found in a tiny abandoned graveyard near to my then-home in Hebden Bridge, West Yorkshire. I imagined Sally living in one of those tall, top-and-bottom houses, roaming the moors and then dying, perhaps of tuberculosis - the gravestone gave no clue. </div>
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Perhaps I am less romantic about life nearly twenty-five years later.
Certainly my artistic style has changed. But these embroideries, like
all the disparate people, places and parts of my life, make up the
person that I am, still am, am still to be. </div>
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Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-44348285609267909292013-08-04T20:23:00.002+01:002013-08-04T20:23:35.825+01:00winter in summer and a fistful of fives<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I took this photograph of winter hellebores in March, which was when I started thinking about writing a blog post. Five months later I've finally got round to it. If I'd had to take another photograph to reflect the changing seasons I'm quite sure it would have been another five months before I wrote anything, so hellebores it is.<br />
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This month I've been blogging on here for five years. I blogged for a year before that, too, about dieting and healthy eating and gluten-free stuff, but that got dull so I started Mouse Notebook. So far this year I've written five blog posts... not because of dullness... I'm not quite sure why... a variety of reasons I suppose. What I'm sure of is that I don't want to stop for good. Now that Google Reader has gone to the bottom of the sea I've stopped reading many other blogs and have been out of the loop for a good while, but I've missed it, and so I've set some of my favourite blogs up on Bloglovin' and am settling back into this lovely gentle community of artists and makers once more. I wanted to pop back myself and say hello to anyone who happens to still be out there, but never mind if you're not, because I guess like most of us I've realised that the main person who gets anything out of this experience is me.<br />
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So, enjoy the hellebores and I will be back soon. Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-46172851451714705882013-03-14T10:26:00.001+00:002013-03-14T10:26:33.988+00:00a little make<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I made this little string of birds for a friend's birthday this week. I hadn't made anything crafty for a good long while and it was fun to get the fabric and thread out for a couple of hours of snipping and threading. I'd forgotten how absorbing it is to lose yourself in something like this. I used wool embroidery thread for the details and added a bit more colour than I would usually use, as my friend is a colourful person. I was pleased with the result and luckily, so was she.<br />
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Next week it's my own birthday and I'm planning a week away in a favourite part of the country. I'm going to take my camera and sketchbook and see what happens. Back soon. <br />
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Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-26255905626381751622013-03-01T18:04:00.000+00:002013-03-01T18:04:00.162+00:00spring<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The first of March is the beginning of Spring for me, whatever the calendar or anybody else says. March is about birdsong, rabbits, primroses, the clocks going forward, more light, green buds, the beginning of the blossom, my birthday. All these things are Spring things. Therefore, it is Spring. The words 'March' and 'winter' just don't go together for me. Spring runs from March until the second week in May when it becomes Early Summer for two weeks. Then, it's summer from June until the end of August. The first two weeks of September are either Late Summer or Autumn depending on the weather and then it's Autumn until the beginning of December, and Winter until the first of March. I do not waver from this, not ever. The so-called 'first day of Spring' on 21st March? Pah. You're three weeks late, mate. The over-excited BBC presenters on <i>Springwatch</i>? It's already May by the time they appear and that's Summer in my house. Airline 'summer' schedules beginning on April 1st? That's got to be a joke, surely. <br />
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No, it's Spring. There's a little posy of Spring flowers from the garden to prove it, look.Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08563878298811062442noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7973188889848358588.post-84812133532024859892013-01-21T11:14:00.001+00:002013-01-21T11:14:57.363+00:00the perseverance of bulbs<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The force for change in a bulb is immense and unstoppable. Only two weeks ago I <a href="http://mousenotebook.blogspot.co.uk/2013/01/a-thousand-and-one-days.html">posted a photograph</a> of this little pot of hyacinths in their stubby green-shooted infancy. Ten days later they were bursting into life and beauty, and today they look like this: <br />
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What you can't see is the scent, the pure white, heady and elegant perfume that wafts around the house when it is warm, and is held close and tight to itself when the rooms cool down for the night. <br />
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When I was an art student I filled a sketchbook with drawings of tulip and hyacinth bulbs from their tiny first shoots to their final blowsy browning overblown fullness. There is something powerfully optimistic about bulbs and their wilful desire to grow towards the light and then bloom, fully themselves, knowing that this is their moment.<br />
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